I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Randomize
