my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
