and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
