The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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