How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
