Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
if only i could text you this smell
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize