Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
They left me at home... I'm a liability
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize