so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
