: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
So many bounce houses so little time
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
