recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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