Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
how can u be prego again
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
