Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
