READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
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