I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize