Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
