you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize