I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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