theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
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