uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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