The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
