Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
