Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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