I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize