apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
