Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
