I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Randomize
