So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
