so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
