My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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