either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
