dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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