with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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