I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Randomize
