Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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