Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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