plz talk dirty to me
I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Is it because I queefed?
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
