i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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