Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
ugly people sure do ruin things
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
