Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
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