He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
