and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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