i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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