I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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