i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
