brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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