Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
