She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
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You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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