If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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