why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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