Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
