okay pat passed out under dana's car
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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